19 [S2 E3] Holly - Reunion in Time Out

An interview with Holly, an adoptee who is currently taking a little time off from reunion with her birthmother. We delve into some very tender topics - gaslighting, boundaries and she even got me to open up about some of my own reunion difficulties.

Show Notes

Topics We Discussed

  • Taking a break from reunion

  • Gaslighting

  • How to prepare for reunion - is it even possible?

  • Diane Wheaton’s episode

  • Choosing a therapist with adoptee experience

  • In reunion and accessing therapy right away

  • Adoptees and boundary issues

  • Boundaries: When to Say Yes, How to Say No, to Take Control of Your Life by Dr. Henry Cloud and Dr. John Townsend

  • Boundaries Where You End And I Begin: How To Recognize And Set Healthy Boundaries by Anne Katherine

  • Thin boundaries, trying to fit in and and be a chameleon

  • Trying the place to find where we truly belong

  • Landric’s episode

  • Boundaries in romantic relationships or work relationships - do we get enmeshed or shut down

  • Oversharing!

  • Being an introvert, an INFJ (Myers Briggs personality types)

  • Reunion Rules/Guidelines: Spouse should be first priority in relationship order, right-sizing relationships with others involved

  • Having trouble naming and articulating emotions

  • Mindfulness to check in with how our body is feeling

  • Meditation apps http://www.stopbreathethink.org/ and https://insighttimer.com/

  • Chronic pain and sleep issues

  • Secret Facebook Group for Adoptees On - access via www.adopteeson.com/partner

  • Meet up in April 21-22, 2017; http://indianaadopteenetwork.org/2017conference/

Recommended Resources