80 [S4 E14] Marni and Karen

Today we are going to look at a reunion between a mother and daughter, and how their guiding principles have helped build a strong and healthy connection over the past three years.

Show Notes

Topics We Discussed

  • Marni’s first episode - Season 2 Episode 10 “A Model Reunion”
  • Marni calls Karen, her “other mother”
  • Karen shares her story as an unwed mother in the 1960s in Ohio
  • How Karen had to hide her pregnancy
  • Learning about the stages of grief helped Karen process what she was going through
  • Marni felt guilty and disloyal to her adoptive parents when she was first exploring reunion with Karen
  • Guiding Principles: 1. Immediate families come first. 2. There are no “what ifs”! 3. Celebrate the gift. 4. Celebrate today.
  • Karen and Marni made a list of things they need to agree on - like holidays, how often to communicate, etc. Going through this list and discussing these things developed trust.
  • We go through some tricky questions: Why do adoptive families get prioritized over biological families and is that for the best? What contributes to reunions failing?
  • Marni addresses feeling vulnerable and how that can make us uncomfortable.
  • Join the pop-up book club

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