41 [S3 E2] Derek - Reunion Brings Ghosts to Life

Derek Frank tells his story about how the movie Philomena brought his desire, to know where he came from, to the surface. We talk about his reunion with his birth father and siblings and what’s holding him back from connecting with his birth mother. We tackle some deep topics including feeling like "culturally cousins" instead of like siblings, grief, and the importance of art therapy. Ridghaus (from season 3 episode 1) returns and, together with Derek, they share behind-the-scenes of the Six Word Adoption Memoir Project.

Show Notes

Topics We Discussed

  • Seeing the movie Philomena and reading Primal Wound alerted Derek to the things he lost through adoption
  • Using a mutual consent registry to find his birth father connecting with each other in just two days
  • In reunion, his paternal family had never kept him a secret
  • Realizing adoption as a taboo; “Why is it that I can’t know these people? Why is it that I can’t know my family? Why is it that I can’t know my history?”
  • His relationship with his birth father, Mike and his siblings; and how losing Mike after just two years of reunion has impacted Derek
  • Finding all the similarities from his paternal family: creativity and even sharing filmmaking as a career with his brother
  • His adoptive mother having difficulties reading emotions and how that’s affected his relationship with her, and also his choice to hold off on connecting with his birth mother
  • Adoptees and grief, art therapy and how creativity can help reach feelings that we may not have words for
  • Behind the scenes of the Six Word Adoption Memoir project

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