Season 4, Episode 8: Amy and Fleurette - This Is Our Normal

It’s an honour to bring you this mother/daughter duo, Fleurette and Amy, for an in-depth view of a long-term reunion. We talk about the unusual circumstances surrounding Amy’s adoption, the disappointment they both felt after their first official in-person meeting, how bringing grandkids into the equation shifted their relationship, and how many years it took them before they felt their reunion relationship was “normal”. Spoiler alert - it was a loooong time.

Show Notes


Topics We Discussed

  • A closed adoption situation that turned out to be an in-family adoption by mistake (thanks SK gov’t!)
  • We hear their story from both Amy’s (daughter) and Fleuerette’s (mother) perspective
  • Fleurette decided, “well I’m the adult here” and summoned up the courage for the first phone call
  • Their first official in-person weekend together was difficult for both of them. It’s not like the movies! “It was a terrible weekend”
  • “I met an adult.” There wasn’t the connection and immediate feeling of love
  • “This is a stranger.” So many unmet expectations.
  • They share some of the hard conversations they’ve had while navigating reunion
  • Fleurette talks about some of the stigma of being a birthmother - even today
  • How their relationship shifted when Amy had her children
  • We talk about the real stuff… how they considered walking away, giving up… what made them stick it out.
  • “Nothing good comes without working for it” - Fleurette
  • Practically speaking - how do they keep in touch during a long distance relationship
  • What’s been great about reunion


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